Kinsey first cited the 10% rule, but lately many have argued that the methods, etc weren't the best. Recent studies released last year cited as high as 20% gay, while others (religious right, etc) used the same studies with a spin claiming 1% or less. As for your problems, I agree with the previous poster, be true to yourself! If you are currently in a marriage, only you can decide which is more important. And, while I've heard of a few surviving, the odds are you'll have to make a choice. For the guy that's trying to deal with his ex who is his best friend, odds are, she already knows or suspects. If it feel right, tell her (probably separately from the hubby). If she is a true friend as embedded as you say, then, at a minimum, it's a great test! Above all, go with your gut. That's what I've done and I haven't had a bad coming out experience yet (but it ain't over). Good luck!
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